Marriage is an experiment, we are the scientists

November 18, 2010

Me and my brother were talking  the other day and he simply said, “Love and marriage is a never ending experiment and we are the scientists“.

That may not mean too much to you guys, but to mean that sums it up perfectly!  I mean, we really don’t know what will come of anything we do in any relationship.  That’s part of the excitement though.  Scientists don’t become scientists unless they love the excitement of unveiling the unexpected.  I mean, there are some things that have already been tested by other fools scientists, like cheating and infidelity.  I know what will happen.  I will lose half  of everything I ever earned, and everything I ever wanted (L).  I dare not test that theory.

I don’t know however, what would happen if I came home with a puppy for instance.  Would L think “OMG, he loves me enough to buy me a puppy and the puppy will become part of our family and we will love him forever and ever.”  That is very possible, but not very probable…YET!  She grew up with puppys so I don’t know. She very well could…….I’m suddenly realizing how terribly awful this example is.

The real point is this.  We will face adversity in nearly every part of our lives.  We aren’t going to know the answers.  We aren’t going to know reasons why.  But we know, we are committed to this thing called love and this lifelong experiment of marriage.  We are going to find ways to make it work, because that’s our goal and our passion.

With me and L’s situation, we both love to shop!  Well…she loves to shop as is evident by her looking at online shopping websites….EVERY DAY(just kiddin’ babe, I know you rest on Sundays).  But, we don’t really make a lot of money.  I mean we make enough to live in swanky super cool Ballston, but not enough to live in Ballston AND online shop daily.  I know what we have to do, I know that more money needs to be made because we have plans, and dreams, and things that we want to do!  Personally, I want 42 kids.  I don’t know how much 42 kids will cost us, but I know I was probably pretty dang expensive (right mom?).

So, I need to get things brewing in my mental lab and figure out how exactly I’m going to make money so L and I can buy a home in The Hamptons with 44 rooms (one for us, and another one for my man cave)!  Let me know if you guys have any ideas.

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How to know she is the one

November 2, 2010

WordPress has this tool where you can check out the stats for the site and you can check out how people actually end up getting to your site.  Well apparently a lot of people want to know a very important question.

How to know she’s the one

I have exhausted this topic about how I found out she was the one i’m sure.  But in case you can’t remember,  here’s my post about it.

The day I knew she was the one

Well it’s kind of refreshing to know that people out there are feeling like little bees in a sugar bag.  They are all filled with glee and have no clue of the mess they are in for.  They obviously are experimenting with the fact that they might be…done.  Well,  I am here to tell all you guys out there that you have been done.  You’ve been done since you decided to open your computer and Google if you have found the one.

Don’t worry….I did the same thing a year ago.

http://ringofyes.com/2010/05/31/the-day-i-knew-she-was-the-one/

Why do guys lie

September 14, 2010

There comes a time in every conversation wig a woman where we have to make a decision on whether to lie or tell the truth.  This moment happens whether we want it to or not.  It just does!

Now, many of us good wholesome guys tell the truth.  Some brave naive foolish men lie.  That lie is followed by immediate regret because 1) men are terrible liars and 2) woman are walking skeptics and are the basset hounds of lies.

The first thing a woman will ask when they catch a guy in a lie is “why did you just lie?

Now everything in us rushes to our brain and we reminded of when we were kids and our mothers asked us the same question.  Unfortunately, we didn’t have a good answer then, but it’s the best option…so we blurt it out…

I don’t know!

Well, we do know, and I am here to tell you why men lie:

  • We are afraid of you! – Not physically, but emotionally afraid.  Afraid of you yelling at us and then us saying things we would REALLY regret (No, that doesn’t mean that we really mean them if we say them in the heat of the moment.  It just means that we were cornered.  No I’m not comparing you to a rabid dog, that’s not what I meant.  I know that’s what it sounded like but….  Well yeah, I know it’s our own fault but, we can’t help it.  True, we are adults and not children but…..SEE!  THIS IS WHY WE ARE AFRAID OF YOU!)
  • We have it implanted in our heads that you won’t believe us – This is probably because even when we do tell the truth, we may slip a small (irrelevant) lie in there, and you detect it and therefore discredit the entire story!  It’s really our own fault, but we don’t see it that way.
  • When we lie we usually lie to end a story or divert attention from the real scenario – This could possibly be because we simply don’t want to talk about it.  I know you guys don’t understand that part about men not wanting to gossip, complain, or focus on details, but it’s in our genetic makeup.
  • Your questions are always loaded questionsEXAMPLE:  “Was she hot?” <~loaded question.  If we say yes, then you will compare yourself to her silently or possibly ask “what is so hot about her?” if you disagree.  Then we have to verbally explain why we think she is hot.  You will then assume or notice that you are not those things and therefore incorrectly assume that you are NOT hot.  Therefore….we just answer “No“.
  • We do it to protect our investment – We have a lot invested in our relationships.  Rocking the boat could be disastrous for our future!  We gotta make sure NOT to cause problems in the future for ourselves.  By lying, we actually do the exact opposite.  We cause many more problems for ourselves.
  • We are afraid to see you cry – We don’t understand female emotions.  We never will.  We don’t try.  Maybe that’s part of the problem, but trust me it’s better this way.  When you begin to cry because we are disagreeing on the color of a couch cushion, we begin to panic.  So we lie, and say “Yes honey, that is Alaska Summer Sky” when it is obviously just a light red.
  • Lastly, men lie, because we really really care about youWe don’t want to see you cry.  We don’t want you to think that you aren’t as hot as the other girl just because we think she is cute.  We don’t want you to think that we don’t want to tell you all the details of our day, we’d just rather watch the game.  We don’t want you to think that we don’t care about anything you say, we just don’t care about Susie from work, or Clarence from accounting.  We don’t want you to think that you’re fat, because we love it when you’re confident in yourself!

I’m dating the starting quarterback!!

September 10, 2010

OK.  I have written about a lot of irrelevant, selfish topics that have yet to arrive at my apartment (Trivia: how wide is a dream? 50 inches) . Therefore, I decided to write about something related to relationships.

I have been in quite a few in the past (my roommates referred to them collectively as G’s Girls). Most were bad but some of them were great (at the time). Only one is going to end up in marriage.  Why is that?  Well, I will give you some reasons why a few of them failed.  Luckily, none of them will be reading this. This might be TMI, but we are all friends here right?!

– Ex GF-A once argued with me for 15 minutes about whether a certain Maryland Basketball player was starting that day or not.  15 minutes later (when the game began) he was starting. I won. Instead of admitting defeat, she muted MY TV and watched Blue Crush at full volume. I hate that movie to this day.

– Ex GF-B told me she kissed my best friend.  I forgave them both.
– Ex GF-B hung up on me. I threw my phone against the wall and scared my roommates half to death.  I walked to her dorm and she kicked me out. I cried (I was 19).
– Ex GF-A did drugs…a lot…(I did not partake)
– Ex GF-C yelled at me when she asked me to work out with her at the gym.
– Ex GF-D was reading my email one day. I asked what she was doing and she replied “reading your email” …………….this really happened.
– Ex GF-C hacked into my myspace account. Then denied it.
– Ex GF-C called me at work to yell at me about the previous point.  Again she thought she did nothing wrong by hacking into my account
– Ex GF-E called me to tell me her ex bf was downstairs at her house and they just kissed. We hung up and she called later to tell me that after we hung up, they did “other things”……again this really happened.
– Ex UnofficalGF – met her husband on a family vacation a week after we left school.  They have three beautiful kids (a happy story!)
– Ex GF-C had a dog. It peed on my TV a hundred times. Maybe more. She thought it was funny.
-Ex GF-E had a younger sister that was more awesome and cuter than her.  Not her fault,but….I dunno, a worthy point.
– Ex GF-E was ashamed to have me as her BF I’m pretty sure. This makes the previous point even more worthy of mentioning
– Ex GF-D made me dinner once from some recipe she saw on tv I think…it was borderline inedible. Banana pudding she made was awesome though.
– Ex GF-D hated when I hung out with my friends.  She tried to stop me from hanging out with my friends.  This made me want to hang out with them even more.

I think that’s enough to talk about  my awful past 🙂  The moral of the post is that, I found someone who I know would never do those things and deep down inside, while these things were happening, I knew they were reasons i should not to be with them.  I couldn’t convince myself of this though.  It’s like being the coach of a good team and having a star QB who is a cocky, egomaniac who goes in the huddle and changes the play so that he can show his athletic prowess once again.  What do you do?  not play them and go with the team player backup QB without the athletic prowess?  Face getting fired, getting booed or even worse, turning your team into a great team.  In the end, you realize that even though you won 8 games, you lost 3 because you didn’t want to play the best player for the team. Play the best QB for the team!

– Current GF/Fiancee/Future wife does none of these things my ex’s did.  This is why she is (dunh dunh dunh!) My starting quarterback!


So attractive

August 11, 2010

So, I come from a pretty athletic family (I dunno about mom, but if  her punch is as heavy as her bark…she could have been a boxer!) and L is was a college tennis player.  I am the most athletic person to never be an athlete, but for some reason in the past (a long time ago, don’t worry) I dated lots of athletes.  College athletes, pro athletes (female sports), high school athletes.  For some reason that’s what I have always been attracted to.

When I found out L was a college tenniser, I was hooked.  She still beats the sauce out of me when we play.  I think that I am pretty good, but I really don’t know what I am doing out there.  I try to emulate her, and other pro tennis players and, I’m sure they’d be embarrassed by my emulations.

Well, last night we sat for about 40 minutes waiting for a tennis court.  After getting on we played for like 2 hours.  By the end we were both exhausted to say the very least.  We both played well, and we both worked so hard.

Then on the way home, while walking back, I realized that she was so happy.  She had fun.  I had fun.  We both were so tired and I had to get up early, and my knees were killing me, but it didn’t matter to us!  We were amazingly proud of each other!

I didn’t let her beat me, I tried so hard to win (she even secretly thinks I tried to cheat on the last point) but she pushed and beat me (as usual).  The best thing about us playing tennis is not the actual playing.  It’s seeing her “no quit” attitude.  It’s about seeing her fight to the end and getting angry at herself sometimes (even though it’s frustrating for me to watch). It’s about me playing so well that I make her even angrier! 🙂

Tennis is our way of challenging each other and proving to the other person, as well as ourselves, that we can and will overcome those challenges.

It’s all about us pushing each other and her doing all that she can to prove that she is worthy of all that she works for.  I don’t know if she knows it, but everyday she proves to me that she is the winner that I have always wished for.  She’s my little MVP!


I received my first executive orders

July 29, 2010

I had a hilarious post written up and L saw it (even though she said she wouldn’t look 🙂) and demanded sulked in the corner to make sure that I take it down.  Actually, she just was really embarrassed, so I decided to put on my nice boyfriend hat for a change as I always do, and delete the post 🙂

Instead, I have an update about our lives.  It’s official….we are a family. Well, at least according to Verizon.

We went to Verizon on Sunday and melted our accounts into one happy family plan.  Not as cool as it sounds, especially since the sales guy (who spoke softer than baby poo) was like, “You’ll save about 10 dollars

That’s it!?! I guess it’s because we both have Droid phones, but stillOnly 10 dollars!  Our bill is still going to be like hundreds of bucks a month!  Well…maybe just one hundred and some change.

Oh and on top of that, one of us I only gets 50$ towards a new phone upgrade vs. the normal $100!  Not fun!

Family plan is a jip…or maybe it’s the fact that becoming a family isn’t all its cracked up to be.

(standby. After that last statement, I might get another executive order to take this down as well)


She beat me again……and engagement photos!!

July 28, 2010

Another day of tennis in the heat, another loss by me!  I actually was winning at one point.  I won the first set 6-1….i then lost the next two and she could barely move she was so tired.  I can’t even beat a tired L.  I think for ten minutes I’m actually getting better and back to reality I come crashing down!.

Oh yeah, we took engagement photos today!  I can’t tell you how they went or anything but, they were amazing (i realized i use this word a lot, but I will one day get a thesaurus).  We took some funny ones, some cute ones (obviously!  I was in them!), some kinda sexy ones.  Some that really show our personality, and some that will highly embarrass me but its what she wanted right! 🙂

The funniest part was that about 5 minutes before our photographer showed up, I couldn’t decide on what to wear.  I took off the jeans, put on other jeans.  Didn’t like it, put on new jeans.  Didn’t like it.  Put on a new shirt, didn’t like it.  I just couldn’t figure it out!

L was looking fantastic and I was the one who couldn’t pick out an outfit.  I can be such a woman sometimes.