RingOfYes.com is … GONE

September 18, 2012

Yes…so ringofyes.com is gone.

I didn’t renew the name in time and it now would cost me $98 to do so.  So therefore, we are moving on to a bigger and better venue!  I know ringofyes.wordpress.com is not as easy to remember but I will have a new one soon. I’m not sure when….but it will be here soon!  I am still toying with the name of it so, I have to figure out what the dealio!

I know some of ya’ll have missed my posts (that’s my one cocky moment of the day) so I decided I need to provide ya’ll with insight and entertainment into the world of L and G.  She is getting funnier by the day too I swear!

The house (unfortunately) looks about the same as when we moved in.  I think L has asked me 12 times “can we hang the sconces today?” I keep running out of excuses.  “I need to find out how to hang on plaster” has been working pretty well though but I think she’s catching on to me.  Two years ago, if you would have asked me what a sconce was, I would’ve have said a British biscuit.

But anyways, the blog will be updated and I have stocked up some pictures for you all to check out in the coming days\weeks.

Navigating the mind of a woman…one tangent at a time

September 18, 2012

So you know what a tangent is right? In case you don’t, it’s a line that touches a circle or curve at one point, making it relevant to the circle or curve (non-mathematical explanation).  Otherwise it wouldn’t be relavant at all. It would just be a line next to a circle.  Well when people go off “on a tangentusually at some point it touches on the point that was originally in focus.  It may go off into lala land thereafter, but at some point, everyone can say “I see where that was relevant

Not with L.

With L, she has her own definition of a conversational tangent.  Case and point.

A few days ago when we were in the car and I was talking about how in college, I downloaded a song which I thought was an R. Kelly song called Chocolate Factory.  Instead I got the Veggie Tales version and when it came on, my friends would make fun of me.  I laughed, she laughed and immediately said the following…(please try to follow).

One time in college, me and my roommates were drinking (for story’s sake, she was of age, they weren’t) in the room and this RA had a crush on me, and he said he was coming down so we had to hide the bottles.  So, we stupidly hid them in paper bags in the middle of the floor!  Then when he came in, one of us bumped the bags and the bottle fell over.  So I said to the RA, “You didn’t hear anything, everything is just fine“.  And he kinda looked at me and said, “You girls be safe!” and I said, “We are!  We are just going down to Lucky’s and then coming right back home

End of story

This is about the point where I nearly explode because I realized halfway through that this story was headed off the highest cliff in conversation history!  I also could tell that she knew that as well.  She refused to look at me, and just waited for me to burst into laughter (which I did)

So remember I talked about how the tangent touches the original story at one point….I HAD to know where her story was related.  Her answer:

“You said in college, and then that reminded me of something that happened in college”

HAHA!  WHAT!?  That is great!  The mind of a woman is a laser maze of tangents.  I’m just Catherine Zeta-Jones, trying to navigate my way through safely.

5 important things I’ve learned in my first year of marriage!

May 30, 2012

In life, you look back and you reflect on things that sucked: Getting your wisdom teeth pulled (hasn’t happened for me yet), getting hit in the private parts for the first time; totaling your car, paying your first bill (which is usually your entire paycheck for some reason at age 16), getting your first B/C/D/F in school.

The thing is that you learn from those awful experiences some of the great lessons that will shape your future.

That brings me to marriage  (awful segway, I know).  Being married and in a great marriage at that has led me to reflect back on some things that sucked and the valuable lessons I learned from them.  I wanted to share with you 5 of those awesome sucky lessons.

1) Be careful what you say; your words are boomerangs with razor blades attached.

This one time I complained about L leaving her socks in the middle of the floor like Cambodian land mines.  Two weeks later, I get socks thrown in my face that she found under the couch and in the cusihons.  My old, crusty, fermented socks that had been composting for 2 weeks.  Thrown.  In my face!  I have yet to complain about her socks being anywhere.

2) Fighting is not what couples do.  It’s what unhappy couples do.

I didn’t realize until after me and L were together just how crazy it is to be fighting with someone you like or love or don’t even care about for that matter.  Me and L have disagreements all of the time, but we talk about it and it goes so much better.  This is much easier to say than it is to do and it takes practice and awareness of each others feelings and the effect of your words.

I wouldn’t have gotten to this point if I hadn’t been in a few explosive relationships in the past.  I have seen things get so bad that after 15 minutes of fighting, I could barely remember why I was so upset in the first place.  I just became a focus on getting the other person to stop yelling louder than me.  The only way to do that is the yell louder and say hurtful things.  See point #1 as to why this is never a good idea!

After all is said and done and the fog has cleared from the graveyard, the bones of bad words will haunt the relationship forever.   (creepy I know).  So I learned after lots of experimentation and apologies and waiting for apologies and demanding apologies that led to more fights about not respecting my need for an apology that was apparently unnecessary, THAT…it doesn’t have to be that way.  It shouldn’t be that way.

3) Remember how to “play cars”

Remember when you were a kid and the silliest things provided endless fun?  My nephew (He’s 5 now as he will proudly exclaim) wants me to do nothing else with him except play cars.  At one point, playing cars was simple.  It made sense to me and I could probably be happy doing nothing else except play cars too!  But now, life is vastly more complicated.  But why?  I was the type of kid who never got bored!

Even being the only child in my house from aged 7 on, I was never bored.  I’d throw the ball to myself, kick the ball to myself, hit the ball to myself. It didn’t matter!  Even as a college “kid” (I am starting to feel old) or a post grad, I was never bored.  I was being social and doing social things with social people.  Then I got married.

Boredom hit me fast and hard.  It wasn’t because I couldn’t find things to do. Heck, if anything, my wife found more things for me to do than I could ever tackle!  It was because things seemingly got exponentially more complicated.  I forgot how to just “play cars”.  So recently I took up a new hobby.  Golf!

Yes it’s expensive and extremely difficult, but it’s my “playing cars”.  It’s something I can just go be by myself and do.  If my wife wants to come along it makes it better!  If my buddies want to play it makes it better!  But alone it’s just as great.  It’s the adult form of “playing cars!”

4) Get it off your chest!

L has this thing where she randomly will say “Confession…” before she wants to say something that may be unexpected, embarrassing, slightly condescending, or just plain cute.  No matter the reasoning for her moment of candidness, I listen to her and take whatever she says seriously.  Sometimes it leads to a truly tearful confession and most of the time it’s just a silly little thing that she doesn’t feel entirely comfortable just coming out and saying.

I have to be honest, I love it when she has these moments of confession because it makes it OK for her to feel vulnerable and she knows that I am not going to judge her for whatever she may say next.  I know that L likes to talk in the car or when we are laying in bed at night with the lights completely off so I try to pick those times to ask her about something that she may not feel completely comfortable talking about at 2 pm on a Tuesday while we are both at work.

L knows that I feel more at ease on Fridays after I’ve had my weekend sip of whatever delicious gin concoction I have brewed up.  We usually have some of our most poignant discussions on Friday nights while just relaxing and watching a bad movie.  A friend told me a few months ago that the method that works best for he and his wife is to text their arguments or discussions.  They will go in different rooms and just text each other.  At first I thought it was crazy but it makes sense.  It takes all of the snide remarks and passive-aggressive comments and body language out of it.

By whatever means you find it necessary to spill your guts to your significant other, do it.  It’s worth it in the end to know that you can speak your mind and be heard and it makes it much easier to do the same when your partner is begging to expose their feelings.  Communication is key!  Any time me and L hold back … it never turns out well!

5) Dream together.  Who knows, maybe you’ll actually make them come true!

When I met L, I didn’t think that I would have a house, family, great job, and a happy life in general before age 30.  We talked about some things and kinda hinted that we wanted some things, but I don’t think either of us really believed that we could have or deserved the things we talked about.  That was until we really started taking what the other said and turning these dreams into a real life.

L expressed that she wanted to eventually be a stay at home mom.  I joked and said that I’d never make enough money and that I’d be working forever, then one day we started talking about her having her own business.  That little dream/joke turned into her having her own successful Mary Kay business which has surprised me with how well it has taken off in just a year!  The best part is that I cautiously supported her every step of the way.  It has been an awesome but trying to say the least.

Then we talked about getting a house.  We dreamed about it.  We made a smart reasonable plan and then things worked out to happen way faster than we had every planned for them to. Needless to say our big dreams came true. If we had never taken the time and faith to dream, who knows where we’d be.  Probably nowhere near where we are today!

Sometimes a dream turnes into a maybe which formulates itself into a plan.  Suddenly a plan is now an accomplishment which is now a celebration!

Valentine’s day…3 years ago

February 14, 2012

3 years ago today, we took a leap and had our first date on Valentine’s Day.  Something happened that day that I will never be able to explain…nor will I ever try.  Thank you and I love you.  I wrote you this as I remember that day…

I stand there in the mall, leaning on the pole with all the weight of my nervous anticipation that the concrete column could bear.  My normally able legs tremble with every heel click coming from around the corner.  The corner that I know will present you in only a matter of time.  The corner that will deliver months of hidden smiles and hopeful conversations.  

I wonder if you will see me or my detonated heart first.  Only my rib cage holding it back from exploding.  My cloak of confidence could be snatched away at the first sight if I dont maintain my composure.  So I unbutton another button on my polo.  That should distract you slightly, I think.  I suddenly find it funny that I choose to hide my apprehension with a distracting display of false confidence.

I have no clue what I am nervous about or what I am thinking about so I try to shut my mind off, but only long enough to hear another set of heels clicking from down the hidden mall corridor.  My fingers find themselves re-buttoning my shirt to regain modesty as my legs begin to boil with exhaustive energy.  

I check my watch.  It’s still early.  I don’t know you well, but I know you wont be late.  And for some reason, this makes me glad that I am here early.  In fact, I think to myself that you’ve probably been sitting in your car for the last 10 minutes, planning your escape route in case I’m not who I said I am.  Or perhaps you’re watching me right now.   

I covertly look around for someone who may resemble what I think you’d look like.  I see an old lady with her grandson looking at books in the bookstore across the hall.  A young girl typing away on her cell phone outside of the restaurant.  Another gentleman nervously bouncing his leg as he waits for someone.

Just as I start to explode with anxiety, I see them. A couple; Holding hands and walking towards the baby store.  One day that will be me.  Us perhaps. Except for the holding hands and walking towards a baby store part.  But I can see myself with someone else. Walking. As a couple.  That’s why I’m here, right?  I turn back to the man sitting on the couch waiting for someone.  He gets up and walks into the bar alone.  Maybe he isn’t waiting for someone. That could be me also if I’m not careful.

Just as I start to relax I hear the sound of heels again and my stomach drops to my knees before springing back up to my chin.  I tune in to the sound from around the corner and try not to stare too hard at it from the corner of my eye.  I can’t see you yet but I know its you because your aura precedes you.

Like fanfare, your heels announce comfort and an allure that’s been missing for years.  Spine melting giggles and a staggering smile are all that I will be blinded by for the next three hours.  The rest of my senses will be puppeted by your presence.  I have no clue what I am in for but your hypnotic glow will erase all doubts along with the memory of their presence.  

Like a flash of lightning your smile disarms me of any diffidence and show me the answer to any dismay. As you get closer and your hazel eyes welcome me to paradise, my mind goes blank and I peel myself from the precarious spot against the pole.  Your smile knocks my confidence askew and I freeze trying to speak.  The closer you get, the less I can remember, the more I lose consciousness of, and the greater my stability sways. Suddenly you sing me your name and my mind goes numb.  

But I know I will never be the same.

Help settle our argument!

February 2, 2012

This past weekend, we went for a walk (like an old married couple).  While on our walk we got into a hilarious but heated argument!  We both were adament about the other being wrong.  We didn’t really care about being right…I just know she’s wrong!  And, she knows I’m wrong.  See where this is going!? So as we break into full out laughter walking down the street, we decide to let my 7,000 readers be the judge of who is right and who is wrong!

FIrst off, let me explain the argument.  I have this thing where I like to walk on the side of L that is closest to the danger zone! In this case, the street is the danger zone as we walk down the sidewalk.  On the other side of L is some harmless woods and a field in this particular case.  Nothing dangerous except for a dead carcass or two. And maybe a fox or a bear.  I don’t know.  I try not think about those things.

Anyways, we are walking and she says, “I like how you like to walk on the inside/outside of me”  and I say, “Wait, i’m not on the inside/outside, I’m on the outside/inside.”  I can’t exactly say which word I used and which one she used because that would be unfair in judging the winner.

BTW, I just randomly selected one to go first and then switched them for the other person.  Don’t get too technical about my typing out the scenario, Inspector Gadget

This boggles my mind! So,  I decided to diagram the situation!

As you can now clearly see,  I am on the _______, where she is on the _______.  What do you think?!  Be sure to send this to your friends! The more votes the better!! Also, feel free to comment to explain yourself.


Things L says (does)

January 26, 2012

She never ceases to amaze me with her…own interpretation of things!  I had Wednesday off from work so I decided to do some work around the house.  One of the unfinished projects is addinghandles to our cabinets.  First off,  when we went to pick up the handles it was kind of on a whim.  We had a gift card and we decided to use it.  We ended up getting all of our handles at no extra cost to us which is awesome!

… well ALMOST all of them.  It turns out that L’s count of 20 handles (based on her mental image of our kitchen) was 4 handles off.  We needed 24.  But that’s neither here nor there.  What’s really important is the two emails that I got the other day.

Wednesday morning I sent her a simply text saying “If u have time send me a pic of how u want the handles on the cabs and drawers.”



Captain towel hook!

January 19, 2012

Wanna see what I have been up to lately? I hung this towel hook all by myself in the master bathroom.  I was tired of opening the shower door completely to reach the towel rack behind it.  It is butt cold in the bathroom at 530 in the morning!

So instead, I am now able to hang it right outside so I only have to peak outside of the door to grab it then slam the shower door shut.

Best 5 minutes I have spent since we moved in.